2015 Writing Resolutions (and why I won't keep them)

A Conversation with my Inner-Self
Me: I have minutely examined my life, ruthlessly evaluated it, and have composed this list of Writing Resolutions for 2015. By following this regime, I will be a new person by this time next year!
Inner-Self: Strange: I feel as though you've said that before.
Me: Well, maybe, but this year, it'll come true, you'll see. I'll be unstoppable, a disciplined machine, the envy of all, and a force to be reckoned with.
Inner-Self: I've heard that before! Look, I'm all for your improvement-
Me: Hey!
Inner-Self: ...but you do have this habit of raising the bar way too high. Moderation and temperance and constancy will gain you a lot more ground, you know.
Me: All right, Ms. Self-Doubt, I'll admit I was over-zealous in the past. Maybe. A little. But this year is different. Take a look at these and you'll see.

1. Resolve: Write 2000 Words per day
Reasoning: Real Authors write consistently and regularly, producing solid content at a steady rate. I could do worse that to follow their example.
Inner-Self: Yup. Because you were a totally sane and productive person during NaNoWriMo two years ago, when you were writing 1600 words a day and trying to beat a deadline. And how much of that book are you still re-writing? Instead, try for a weekly goal and good content, rather than merely more content.

2. Resolve: Read Only Classics
Reasoning: All writers know that reading more makes you a better writer. Since the goal is to be the best, surely limiting myself to only classics will make me the best. After all, garbage in, garbage out, right? Henceforth, only classics for me!
Inner-Self: Okay, I'll admit the logic on this one. But do you seriously think you're going to be able to give up Star Trek novels and those lame Christian romances that you've been reading since you were ten? That'd be like asking you to stop watching flopped lame TV shows that star Roddy McDowall, ('Planet of the Apes' and 'Fantastic Journey', for instance). We both know that isn't going to happen, so instead, resolve to incorporate more classics into your reading diet, rather than an exclusive classic curricula. 

3. Resolve: Less Chocolate, More Cardio
Reasoning: A healthy body is a healthy mind and with more of my time being devoted to sitting behind a screen, it is necessary to make health more of a priority. Therefore, I am cutting chocolate and embracing the workout outfit - I will be a new, fitter me by the end of February.
Inner-Self: Again, I'll admit the logic of this resolution, but you left out something important: you turn into a bear if you don't get your daily chocolate fix. By all means, workout and cut the cheese and bacon from your diet, but for the sake of your family, friends, and business associates, keep the chocolate, okay?

4. Resolve: Start the Day Right
Reasoning: Early morning is the best part of the day: quiet, peaceful, and woefully underused by yours truly. I therefore resolve to get up at the crack of dawn every morning, jog for twenty minutes before eating a healthy breakfast, then buckling down to writing before getting to work on time. No more late nights spent watching 'Dark Shadows' or 'Fantasy Island': I will become the proverbial Early Bird.
Inner-Self: (gleeful, uncontrollable laughter)

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